And then the Pandemic Tears came

Monday morning. I made the mistake of starting my day, my week off by rolling over in bed and reaching for my cellphone. A "what's new with the world?" type check-in, while sipping coffee.

I've been slowly working up to a resilience toward Facebook posts that are divisive, negative, political or even COVID-19 newsy. That in itself took 6+ weeks.

Today I turned attention to an eclectic array of articles. News, public interest, Youtube travel vlogs and viral tidbits.

Then I realized I had not worked up a resilience to the changes in our world since a pandemic was unleashed, but rather I had compartmentalized it along with all the associated emotions.

All of a sudden, watching sweet and inspiring clips, I cried. Large tears of grief, sadness, fear, loss. Deep and soulful. Longing for life as it used to be.

Prepare yourself. The following videos bring it home, fast.

Hugs. Social contact and physical contact in general. GONE. If they're not in your bubble, it is frowned upon to hug a friend, grandparent, neighbor, mentor, kid with a booboo... anyone.

Handshakes are gone too.  Smiles are hidden under masks. In essence, gone because what is a smile if you can't see it, share it, catch it?

Eye contact, while not forbidden, seems to be missing in a big way when people are afraid of people.

COVID-19 has stolen contact with others from me and nothing makes that more obvious than watching a movie/documentary made not that long ago, that is filled with contact. Humans have always shown care to another by holding a hand, giving a hug, placing a hand on a shoulder.

With every interaction, Michelle Obama reaches out to touch a person. It's a beautiful, comforting, connecting thing... that I'm sorry to say, makes me cringe right now. I have (sadly) been reprogrammed!

Have you met Kara and Nate?
Mark and I have been Kara and Nate vlog followers since early 2018. This young Tennessee couple set the audacious goal of visiting 100 countries in a year of travel and began that journey in 2016.

One year morphed into 4 years and until 2 months ago, they were uploading 5 minute videos to Youtube about their traveling and destination adventures on a regular basis. 100+ countries and 7 continents later... I was hooked. (Me and a million other people!)

Kara and Nate fled the Philippines just before it locked down  all airports. They spent 3 weeks living in a hotel in Singapore before making the hard decision to come home. The video above documents the journey. Travel in times of COVID is sobering.

COVID-19 has stolen our freedom to roam. The ability to eat street food and investigate new places. But for me the tears rolled as I watched footage of airports - empty. Lifeless. There is a special place in my heart for airports and for me, this was like watching an old friend get sick and suffer.


For Kara and Nate the nomad life is on hold, indefinitely. I'm sad for them, but I'm sad for the rest of us, living vicariously through them too. If you, yourself can't travel, then watching someone else muddle through a border-crossing, make language and currency faux pas and simultaneously have their time of their life, is the next best thing.

The grief and anxiety of not knowing when it will be a possibility again and whether other countries will welcome us or shun is complex.

I am wondering whether we will know when travel is less (COVID-19) dangerous to ourselves or another country?  Will not traveling at all be just as damaging to the wanderlust of our souls and the struggling economies of our international friends.

Perhaps I also grieve because there are no answers, there are no solutions right now.